This morning I read 2 brilliant blog posts from Geneen Roth and Katie Silcox that both lit me on fire. Its been a heart opening week of connection, and curiosity into what sharing my body love work will look like. Every time I decide on a game plan of how I want it to be... an event gets canceled or no one registers. Its taken me a few months to let the ideal in my head go, so it can just be what its going to be!
The word thats been sweetly nagging me has been... Surrender. Apparently I am not in control (hahahha oh man I am SO NOT IN CONTROL). This new realization has also pushed my own relationship with myself and body to new levels, as if the universe is asking "Is this what you want?"... "Do you really love yourself flaws and all?". Giving me an option, either go all in or go back to sleep but this one toe in one toe out shit aint cutting baby doll.
I LOVE putting all my attention and love on others and sometimes give myself the short end of the stick. But just like Ive learned again and again, I have to fill myself up before I can give. I wonder how many times Ill get the pleasure of learning that sweet little lesson. I have also been reminiscing on where I started, as a sort of celebration of how far I have come.
When I started this journey I felt so utterly hopeless. That no one in the world could ever understand or feel the pain and disconnection from the body that I was feeling. How could a person feel so uncomfortable in her own skin, I thought I was broken, like somehow I was just missing some parts. When I read the book "When Food Is Love" By Geneen Roth there was a level of vulnerability that emerged showing me that I was not actually alone. That even people who had the seemingly "perfect figures" also struggled with body image issues and disconnection.
I thought I needed something outside of myself to be fulfilled... to be a whole complete person. Subconsciously I tried to fill the hole with food, when really I needed my own attention and love. The body listens to our every thought, it steps in and protects us when we need saving. I thought I was at war with my body when all along she was trying to help me pick up the pieces and lead me back to her. What a precious gift the body is, always listening and supporting us no matter how far we stray. That my dear friends is unconditional love. And its within us for the day we enter this world.
I don't know where Body Love will go, but I'm open to the possibilities that it can be more then the box Ive tried to put it in. Its not about money or a business, for me its about my path and sharing what I know and have been through. I want to help anyone and everyone who needs it, I also want to be very honest... this is a practice (most of us don't come out the gate with self love in tact). We have been lead to believe by the media and cultural BS that our bodies are for magazines, for others, and to look pretty. Our bodies are sacred vessels and our greatest gifts... The heart and soul. Our bodies are for US.
So cheers to surrendering how we think things should look, and just letting them BE! I honor my body and I honor yours too. ALL BODIES ARE GOOD BODIES. And that is the TRUTH. <3 <3
IM GOING ALL IN BABY! ALL IN!!!